Like I Was Saying...
One of my favorite films back in the day was Cameron Crowe’s Vanilla Sky. I loved the quirky story, Crowe’s use of music, and of course, fell absolutely in love with Penelope Cruz’s character, Sofia. I remember leaving the theater floored by the movie.
I worked nights back then and stayed up well past my afternoon bedtime as long as possible, with the movie still resonating in my head. I was in my early twenties back then and a little lost. I worked a job I had no business in troubleshooting data circuits. I was still suffering from heartbreak with no healing on the horizon. And well, my future seemed a little bleak back then. Things weren’t going my way or any way, for that matter. In short, life sucked.
My big question back then was, “Is this it?”
This one line in that movie kept turning in my head.
Tom Cruise’s David Ames is living this incredible life he inherited from his father, a media tycoon (think Rupert Mudrock). Certainly, David has got it all: the media empire, the cool classic muscle car, famous friends (Spielberg makes a cameo), hell, even a hot girlfriend played by Cameron Diaz, still riding There’s Something About Mary wave. He’s got it all but is still unhappy. To this day, I don’t know why I empathized with his character. I lived in a two-bedroom apartment with an old college friend, driving a ’99 Nissan Frontier, but I did.
Enter Sophia, who sees right through David’s shallow, listless life. They ditch his star-studded birthday party and have this incredible night of just hanging out. Their meeting has the making of one a great love story. Having met Sophia, David Ames sets out to take charge of his life, but alas, tragedy strikes.
During their brief courtship, Sophia delivers this line: “Every passing moment is another chance to turn it all around.”
That line kept worming its way into my head as I fell asleep. I remember thinking I could change things. So long as there were no crazy ex-girlfriends around.
I remember waking up feeling a little less depressed about my life. I had woken up, and the moments would keep coming, praise God. And they did.
I wish I could say life has been perfect since that day. Of course, it hasn’t. There were tons more heartbreak and my fair share of disappointments. A lot of my mess is often self-inflicted. But when things got bad, I always remembered that line.
It was then that I truly believed I could turn it all around.
It’s been twenty years since I first heard that line. I found my life calling as a salesman. I found my loving wife, Lucy, and have a wonderful son, Marcos. My future outlook is a tad brighter these days.
What’s odd now is, like most people, things are happening in my corner of the universe, outside our control. I’m talking COVID, SNOVID ’21, and the stark reality of death and loss. Somethings you can do something about; others you take in stride.
Am I where I want to be in life?
In some places, sure; in others, not even close. But there’s another moment coming - again, praise God - and so long as I have one more moment, it’s another chance to turn it all around.